Stormtrooper Writes Hilarious Resignation Letter as Death Star Explodes


A Stormtrooper writes a hilarious resignation letter as the Death Star explodes, in a fitting piece of Star Wars satire tackling current U.S. events.

A Stormtrooper writes a hilarious resignation letter as the Death Star explodes. Stormtroopers were initially introduced as the foot soldiers of the Galactic Empire during the original Star Wars trilogy. Many Stormtroopers were on board the first Death Star when it was blown up by the young Luke Skywalker in Star Wars: A New Hope. 

Stormtroopers have become an iconic part of Star Wars lore ever since their debut in A New Hope. The masked soldiers were the epitome of conformity, serving the evil Darth Vader and the Emperor without showing traces of individuality or free will. (Stormtrooper cadets were trained to forgo their birth names in favor of an assigned trooper number.) There have been several evolutions of the Stormtroopers. Still, the soldiers in the white suits are without a doubt the most recognizable versions of Stormtroopers Star Wars fans are familiar with (and the ones best known for having horrible aim.) Stormtroopers have certainly been a part of pop culture since their inception, with a recent example being the case of Stormtroopers enforcing social distancing guidelines at Disneyland.

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Related: Star Wars: Why Stormtroopers Have Really Bad Aim

A hilarious satirical letter from the Washington Post written by columnist Alexandra Petri cleverly invokes a Stormtrooper’s resignation letter as a commentary on U.S government officials resigning after the attack on the U.S Capitol. The letter is titled, “I see no choice but to resign from this Death Star as it begins to explode.” Check out an excerpt from the hilarious letter below.

It is with a heavy heart and a deep sense of responsibility that I must submit my resignation, effective immediately, from my post on this Death Star. However, I see no other choice. Now is the time for all of us to stand up from our posts and do what is right. It’s been an honor to work on this Death Star. I love the aesthetic. I love how I’ve been able to pursue my greatest passion: destroying planets and pressing buttons. I love my little hat that is a sunshade for no reason! I love the easy-to-access computer interfaces, the blast-door equipped hallways and that one area we can access only by pressing a button to extend a bridge. Our design always made a lot of sense to me! And I love our reliable trash disposal system and the little one-eyed tentacle fella that lives in it. In general, I’m proud of this station and of what we’ve achieved on it, together.”

The Stormtrooper also notes that the only thing he hates more, “The population of the planet Alderaan, who totally deserved it, is consequences. Consequences and not having a job!” While the fate of the lone Stormtrooper with a rare sense of self-preservation is unknown, the letter itself is a hilarious example of how Stormtroopers can be used in real-life situations to make a point. All it takes is one lone soldier taking a stand for what is right for other like-minded men or women to follow suit, regardless of their ulterior selfish motives.

Canonically Finn from the current Star Wars movie trilogy was the first known Stormtrooper to defect from the ranks and demonstrate free will. Finn chose to follow his conscience instead of obeying orders that he knew weren’t right or ethical. (Finn’s original Stormtrooper number was even A New Hope Easter egg.)

Star Wars has always been an intergalactic space opera that served as a commentary on the dangers of self-serving politicians and the soldiers that obey their orders without question. Stormtroopers are symbols of obedience and oppression, not only to others but ironically to themselves as well. They may be famously known for their terrible aim, but not all Stormtroopers lacked a soul.

Next: Stormtroopers’ TK Numbers Explained

Source: The Washington Post

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